new dates in season - waiting for mastectomy
7/4/06
Writing helps me make sense of difficult circumstances,
altho my yoga practice entangles in the meaning of words.
In two weeks my friend, who is also a yoga teacher, is
scheduled for a bilateral mastectomy and she's courageous
enough to ask her family & folks to send their love and
support. After years in remission, cancer is here in a
serious way. Blog visitors can offer a prayer, send
positive energy to join my own healing intentions for
my friend.
in the same room with mortality,
how worried you've been...
loss can seem so small
when placed before something bigger,
face to unknown face.
hai ku has morphed into
different meter,
an odd squared and prime sequence,
9-5-5-9-5
the beats break apart...
yesterday's rain falling with tears, i am sad,
i shake my fist toward the window, out at the sky beyond
dearie,
i know your family is sitting with you,
as i am sitting here, holding your hand,
watching the clock tick into tomorrow.
love, )oh~
Writing helps me make sense of difficult circumstances,
altho my yoga practice entangles in the meaning of words.
In two weeks my friend, who is also a yoga teacher, is
scheduled for a bilateral mastectomy and she's courageous
enough to ask her family & folks to send their love and
support. After years in remission, cancer is here in a
serious way. Blog visitors can offer a prayer, send
positive energy to join my own healing intentions for
my friend.
in the same room with mortality,
how worried you've been...
loss can seem so small
when placed before something bigger,
face to unknown face.
hai ku has morphed into
different meter,
an odd squared and prime sequence,
9-5-5-9-5
the beats break apart...
yesterday's rain falling with tears, i am sad,
i shake my fist toward the window, out at the sky beyond
dearie,
i know your family is sitting with you,
as i am sitting here, holding your hand,
watching the clock tick into tomorrow.
love, )oh~
posted by John at 11:11 PM
6 Comments:
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Oh, how interesting that I delayed my practice this morning until after reading Emails. My practice is all about prayer. And my prayer is always the same - I pray for knowledge of God's will for me, and the power to follow the path of acceptance - accepting Life on Life's terms.
I used to think that the path of acceptance was all about lowering the proverbial bar. I thought it was about accepting whatever shit Life has to dish out. I thought it was about a diet of shit. I thought that the path of resistance had a 4 star menu. What I know to be true today is that those entrees are illusions. I might write a menu of cash and prizes, no disease, no war, no poverty, no incest, no floods - I might even choose one from column a, b or c. But the waiter will never bring my order. I'll sit there and starve.
I told the waiter to go back to the kitchen and bring me another plate. Guess what - that's the only plate in the kitchen with my name on it. I keep thinking the food is going to taste different, look different, smell different. That's what I get for thinking. There's only one switch - on/off , accept/resist.
When I pray for knowledge of God's will for me, the answer is "Eat your vegetables, all of them, and then go to sleep."
Dear John - I will walk down the path of acceptance with your friend, with tears in my eyes and love in my heart:)
xoJody
I'll keep Lorraine close to my heart. Mary
Dear John,
I am so heartbroken for L, you and family and friends, I know
no one as courageous as L and my thoughts are with her. If
there is anything I can do, please ask me, I am leaving town for a few days to visit college with my youngest. I'll be back on Wednesday.
Much love , wishes and positive energy!!!
Nevine
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
L said...
Dear John,
Your poetry has taken on an expansive view in this one, I think you might want to send this one out for publication. It is an honor to be its subject.
As for the content. You are right. No matter what I am doing and how engaged I am in doing it, the cancer keeps poking me in the ribs. Thank god for grandchildren, they are so in the moment that there is no other choice when they are around.
I so appreciate your beautiful words and your generous thoughts. It is much like walking through a dream or a cartoon, very surreal. I'm okay though, it is just process now. One breath at a time, I just have to remember to breathe.
Be well and thank you so much.
Love,
L
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